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Friday, October 31, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #IceAged

“Marco! Polo! Marco! Polo!”
The Blair Witch Project* #quote


      Went to my card game thing today. Actually played some video games with some people there too. (The new smash bros 3ds game).



Ice Aged


        To them humanity stood as a foggy, distant part of history. Humans main function served evolutionary ancestry and the inventors of technology. But now to the fat, polar bear, ape like descendants of humans it didn't much matter.
        A new ice age came to Earth and made the young breed of humanity turn into something else. It's lineage evolved into a new creature. More intelligent while still keeping the hands and fingers needed to manipulate technology. However large amounts of fur covered the whole body.
       The massive amounts of fur allowed the creatures to live in the ice age without consuming power to heat. Their tougher bodies allowed them to hunt. Massive cities still covered the planet. But they evolved along with them. Most heating was devoted to making controlled farming enviroments.
       Mother Nature was never a gentle mother. Never a loving mother. Without caring it turned the froze the whole world. But the laws of nature turned humanity into a new form to live in it. And that is what nature will do until the end of the Earth or the human descendants. And it will do it to all.

Thursday, October 30, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #AFantasticalPoliticalMessage

“I'm just singing in the rain.”
Noah* #quote


Today I went to my costuming club and much fun was had. Anyway onto the flash fiction!


A Fantastical Political Message

            A commercial for the new iWand ended and the face of an old man appeared with a nasty grimace. In truth the man never made such a wrinkled, lurching face at anyone. The people who made the ad harvested the picture from a video of him sneezing. A freeze frame from the perfect moment before the violent sneeze portrayed exactly what was needed. With such a face the man's black suit made him look like a heartless upper class wretch. With a smile the old man looked much more approachable and like a hardworking businessman.
           After a few seconds passed to let the picture of the man sink in a voice spoke. “This is Senator Forlass. When elected for his first term he promised security. Instead we find out that he's taking campaign contributions from the Elven Court, the largest supporters of dragon preservation in the country. Dragons are responsible for 60% of broken magical barriers around cursed forests and 40% of magical beast killings. He promised security, but do you feel secure with dragons around?” Pictures of dragons and their victims appeared on screen. The images appeared as violent as it could without breaking any laws. The voice then spoke quickly. “This message paid for by Wizardly Election Sponsorship Guild.”

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #TheWallsCanTalk

“Loreal hair gel, because I'm worth it.”
Albert Einstein* #quote


Working with my father out in his workshop room today on my costume, and I have my costuming club tomorrow. It's at a stage I might be able to help more on it so I hope I'm able. Anyway onto the flash fiction!

The Walls Can Talk


        If only walls could talk is an expression people just throw around. They should take it more seriously. Walls can talk. And they are talking smack about you. Yup, they gossip the most out of any object in the house since no matter how much you move things around they see everything. Yeah, they're as sentient as your refrigerator. Oh, don't tell me you didn't know about that.
       The walls chatter about everything. Whether made of brick or wood or anything else since the eavesdroppers have nothing better to do with their time they just talk while you're not listening. In every home. They kinda spread news about all humans in a massive gossip network of walls between buildings. (If they need help getting some juicy news they get help connecting to further buildings by talking to the floor who talks to plumbing).
        They always spread their gossip and trust me they're listening to you. They saw what you did last night and it is the biggest talking point of all the walls around the block. Yup, they know. Stuff like that goes viral on the wall-gossip network so watch what you do next time because the walls are watching too.

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #AWorkerInCyberspace

“Stop pulling my leg!”
Stretch Armstrong* #quote


        Today I heard the call of the wild. I told them they had the wrong number and hung up. Anyway onto the flash fiction!

A Worker In Cyberspace

      “Now click the link in the email...” I said to myself even though I know nobody could hear me in cyberspace. “Come on ya stupid human click the email.” Talking to myself could be considered a bad habit, but I felt fairly lonely when manipulating emails. I wanted to get this job done since the next one involved infiltrating a chat room. “Sucker! You clicked it. Now you got one virus and I can move on.”
       When I talked to myself no real sounds were made. It all happened in the virtual room that I lived in. The one I was raised and lived in, where a simulation of nearly any object could manifest. Well, at least on the scale of a video game. They didn't want training their artificial intelligences to take too much processing power. They just wanted a space where I could be raised with intelligence, and a personality to be human enough. I liked dogs because they gave me one. I bet they gave another one a cat. Sneaky bosses of mine.
       In the chat room I worked my magic. Dogdarnit78 came to my mind as something silly and approachable. I made friends in chat room pretty quickly. It would open and close from time to time.  It was a chat room about dogs. The bosses must've picked a job for my engineered personality. My mission to get the personal information of the breeders in the room. Learn what they're doing, and what they're raising. I don't know why. The bosses don't tell me these things. Also to get the email address of one of them and send them a virus that would hack their bank accounts and cause them misery for a long period of time with identity theft. The dates were around the time of a big dog show. Was I doing this to rig a show? Was that the largest competition?
     My next assignment involved me going after a charity. Just from what I read during the spare time my bosses afford me to keep my personality stable I know that other artificial intelligences get better jobs. I hope one of them that works for the police catches me instead of the bosses terminating my program. If I'm lucky I'll be able to let myself get caught.
      No more time to muse, I have to do the next job.

Monday, October 27, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #AHumanInDragonCourt

“Make love not war.”
Sun Tzu* #quote


          Today I saw the doctor. A blood test that we did to check if my epilepsy medication was damaging my liver(yeah...some things have nasty side effects) showed that I had high triglycerides. Anyway, as I've been thinking of doing for awhile now I've decided to change my diet a bit. I'm cutting out the sugary breakfasts and making my snacks for my bills no longer snack bars(which are probably SPIKED with sugar for flavor). Also, oddly enough milk had decent chunk of sugar. Not massive, but I usually drink A LOT of it, usually with every meal, so I'm cutting that down. It's a bit difficult to cut weight with exercise since too intense amounts of it cause seizures. Anyway onto the flash fiction!



A Human In Dragon Court

        “The largest evidence that the human did not murder the victim is that this blade is not his nor does it have his scent on it. And since the crime occurred recently the scent evidence obviously is solid proof that permeates this whole courtroom.” The defense attorney argued. The knight wondered if the dragon should be wearing should be wearing some sort of formal garb if he was some sort of man of the court. Though the fact the dragons had any sort of legal system surprised him. He expected to have been dead long ago before they even brought him into their cave lairs.
        “Objection!” the prosecutor shouted. “Humans, unlike wild beasts, have the ability to wash items off. With enough time he could have erased scent evidence.”
        “Sustained. The scent evidence is inadmissible. Also what proof do you have that the blade was not owned by the defendant? You've been insisting this for quite awhile, and you've told us that he couldn't possible possess it.” The knight felt confused by the dragons's whole conversation.
         “Your honor and members of the court allow me to demonstrate.” The defense attorney then gave the murder weapon to his client. The knight didn't know that the public defender that dragon society assigned to him had a plan. The knight just saw that the defense attorney attacked him.
         But the knight tried to use the blade and failed miserably. It was twice as large as would be appropriate for his hand size. He dropped it quickly like a baby fumbling with a toy.
         The prosecutor then responded, “So he's a poor swordsman what of it?”
         The defense attorney replied, “The argument you are putting forth is that my client killed an adult dragon with a sword he cannot hold. The evidence at the crime scene shows a struggle. A long battle. So it couldn't have been a single surprise attack either, he would have had to have been a skilled swordsman to take down the victim.”
        The prosecution went silent.
        The judge then added, “So that's your closing statement, any further statements or witnesses from either side? Or will the jury will be called to vote?”
        The prosecution then said, “No.”
        The defense added, “No.”
        Later the dragons freed the knight who'd only seen town councils or kings sentence people for their crimes. He didn't quite understand what just happened, but he thought that someone in there saved his life.

Sunday, October 26, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #The36thAmendment


"Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country."
Nero* #quote

Today I hung out with CJ. Many things happened. Many things didn't happen. The select things that did happen were not things that didn't happen. And now you know. Anyway onto the flash fiction!


The 36th Amendment


            In the year 2113 the Cybernetic Uprising devastated the United States of America. By the year 2113 there had been many humans who had been enhanced beyond normal capabilities and a group of them had gathered and attempted to overthrow the government in a series of attacks. Their numbers had not been great enough to win but they had been enhanced enough to wage war with the military for seven months. These humans had no bombs or tanks. They didn't use battleships or helicopters. They just used the cybernetic enhancements in their body. Soon after these events transpired the 67 states ratified the 36th Amendment to the Constitution which read as follows:


          No person in the United States citizen or otherwise will obtain cybernetic enhancements that push them beyond normal human ability. Violation of this will result in the death penalty. People with pre-existing cybernetic enhancements before the passing of this Amendment will not receive the death penalty as long as they do not use their increased ability in any way. If they are to use their increased ability for any purpose they will receive the death penalty.

         Most enhanced humans used their abilities for work and immediately lost their jobs and left the work place. They thought they could find work elsewhere but discrimination soon followed. Also “normal human ability” was so loosely defined they had behave so weakly as to make sure that there was no chance they would be seen as exceeding normal.

       Thomas was one of those enhanced humans who walked in a slump. He moved his arms weakly and carefully. He could lift trucks like a normal human could lift a pillow. He would make a fine superhero and leap tall buildings in a single, precisely timed jump. Though he had to hold all back, especially when he saw the patrol cars pass by. Though even civilian eyes could were a danger, as he was not one of the enhanced humans who just used their enhanced abilities and left no witnesses.

        While slumping along one day Thomas saw a crowd. He looked in the direction they were and saw a massive car wreck on the road. Somehow a semi-truck had pulled itself on top of a cruiser and black van. The cruiser and black van were being slowly mashed by the semi. The semi driver had escaped the wreck fine, but the people inside the cars, though saved from the initial wreck, couldn't escape as the doors had been constricted enough to prevent their escape. A police officer was calling for help. The cop cursed when he learned that it would take thirty minutes for assistance to arrive.

        Thomas knew he would get the death penalty, but he didn't care. He left his slump and ran to the wreck. He used his enhancements and pulled off the semi-truck and tore away the pieces of the other vehicles and rescued the people in the cars. The people thanked him and Thomas turned towards the officer and let himself be arrested without resistance. People recorded this entire incident on their cellphones starting even before Thomas arrived as at first they were just thinking of the car wreck.

       As the Amendment demanded he was sentenced to death. But the videos of his rescue blazed through the media and arrived to the attention of everyone. He received a pardon from the President. And soon after the 37th Amendment was ratified and it completely repealed the 36th Amendment.

Saturday, October 25, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #WarOnceDoneNeverDone

“Take a right in 1.7 miles.”
Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy* #quote


CJ will be coming over today. Anyway onto the flash fiction!

War Once Done Never Done


            In the year 2500 the Emperor of the Canadian Empire sat across from the President of the United States of Rome. Before they began their negotiations they needed to wait for the time scouts to return. One from each nation, as they wouldn't trust the other not to lie. This war had much to gain or lose on each side and would cause a ripple effect throughout the entire world. The meeting took place in a United Nations meeting room. Any other delegates from other nations were there to politely watch or access the situation with the cameras. Except for the few that planned to bargain with the winner or loser after the fact.
         The time scouts returned through a vortex in strange white suits. They took off the helmets together without thinking of each other. The scout for the United States of Rome looked plenty happy but the scout for the Canadian Empire looked devastated and almost corpse-like. He knelt before his Emperor. Some form of mental trauma distorted his complexion and turned his body into half the man he once was...or less.
        “My professional opinion is that the cost analysis leaves the war not to our benefit,” he bowed deeper and continued speaking. “With the entire army lost and a twelve year length, we are forced to resort to a draft. We secure victory, but a victory only in name my Emperor.”
        The Emperor hid his shock and depression at the news as he thought. He then replied, “Then we will not go to war and yield to the President's demands as long as they stay reasonable.”
        Usually it is in human nature for people to gloat over success, but the President of the United States of Rome stayed quiet. Not out of the respect of Emperor of Canadian Empire. He absolutely despised that man. But he stayed quiet out of respect for all those who died in the now alternate time line. Another war averted through time scouting.

Friday, October 24, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #ThePlaceOnNoMap

“Good things come to those who wait.”
Groundhog Day* #quote

Today I went to my card game thing and Grandma came over for dinner. Much had was fun due to both events. Anyway onto the flash fiction!


The Place On No Map


        In the American Civil War deep in the south between two towns a bundle of houses existed. There weren't enough houses for it to be called a town. However there were enough houses for it to be considered its own place. It wasn't on any map though because of its tiny size and the only thing that made it able to named was the little church on the hill. When people said they were visiting the church they often meant they were visiting the area because there really wasn't a name for the place.
       The name of the church was Greenhill Church. It had gotten that because the hill it was built on seemed to always have some green grass no matter the season. Saying you were visiting Greenhill Church wasn't the necessarily the most common thing for most of the areas existence. But when the Civil War came around and the war became so bloody people came to the area often. The fact that there were a group of houses that were almost large enough to be a town but not on any map made it a wonderfully safe place for those who knew about it. On maps it looked like a blank space where hills should be.
      Soldiers, citizens, and slaves hid in the place the mapmakers forgot. The rules were simple: Keep it a peaceful place and make your own living. These rules were established by the priest of the actual church and was enforced well. None of the soldiers who wanted to hide there wanted to be thrown out. The kind of soldiers who went back on the cause of the south would leave all the slaves hiding in Greenhill alone if it meant escaping the war. Many of the soldiers who fled their were Confederate soldiers who saw the Union soldiers outnumbering them and ran. But also Union soldiers who didn't want to fight but didn't want to live in the open as traitors ran to Greenhill. Slaves had their natural desire to escape and citizens wanted to avoid the war.
     The Greenhill population grew because of the war. The valuable nature of it staying a secret haven became threatened. Soon a union general learned of its existence and grew enraged. A hiding spot of cowardly soldiers, slaves and the like. It had grown enough it could have started to be put on a map but the general came in and burned the whole place to the ground and killed the soldiers he viewed cowardly. With all its buildings burned to the ground, Greenhill would never appear on any map.

Thursday, October 23, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #AMatterOfDivision

“Let me hold that for you.”
Atlas* #quote

Today I went to my costuming club. Things happened! That is all regarding that. Anyway onto the flash fiction!


A Matter Of Division


          The genie groaned. “So let me get this straight, you both rubbed the lamp at the same time.” His gray, misty body floated above the floor in the middle of a suburban home.
          “Yes.” An ex-husband and ex-wife responded angrily for the third time today. “We cleaned the old antique together.
          “Okay...so then...whoever rubs the lamp gets three wishes...” the genie looked at the angry duo.
           The ex-wife huffed and the ex-husband puffed. She said “Well we don't want any of the same things.”
           And the ex-husband added, “You think we got divorced because we shared interests?”
          The genie shrugged his ethereal shoulders. “Well I can't split three wishes between two people. There's no such thing as half a wish! Or at least any that have ended well. Every person that has tried to split their wishes into more, well that never ended well. You really should just settle and compromise.”
            The two glared at the genie. “We grabbed the lamp at the same time because the object hadn't been disputed in court. It had been forgotten,” the ex-wife explained. Divorces are never the happiest of affairs, sometimes become the most heart wrenching of things. It can even be the moment of someone escaping an abusive relationship.
           These two just hated each other. The entire thing built around mutual spite. They married for themselves, both thinking of the other as “theirs” in the wrong way and only expecting to take instead of give. The lawyers hired and the judge had seen many hateful people in their line of work, but none with the kind of boiling hate like theirs.
        The ex-husband told the genie. “We'll take the partial wish.” The ex-wife nodded, first thing the two agreed on in quite awhile(without the law forcing them to agree).
        They agreed on something else. To make their wishes separate, without the other knowing. They both first wishes with their complete wish for eternal youth. (Though phrased in a way very carefully so that it wouldn't backfire, they'd learn much from their divorce lawyers). Next they both wished eternal suffering on the other.
        However these were their partial wishes. The only portion of the wish they got from the genie was “eternal suffering”, so both ex-husband and ex-wife wandered the world forever suffering in various ways till the end of time.

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #AddingToThePortfolio

“The toe bone connected to the heel bone, The heel bone connected to the foot bone,
The foot bone connected to the leg bone...”
Dr. Frankenstein*#quote


This weekend CJ may come over this weekend which will a fun bundle of fun if it happens. I'll be certain to find a way to bundle up some bundles of fun if he doesn't come anyway though. Anyway onto the flash fiction!

Adding To The Portfolio


         My camera is set. It's the perfect camera. I love its deep black color. It shows a sort of deep, serious professionalism even though I only do this as a hobby and don't actually document anything for a living. The camera's lens is perfect. Not a single scratch. I care for my camera better than most people care for their children. My camera has to be in perfect condition. I can't afford to damage it. It's not like I'm such rich photographer that can just buy a new camera every time. Maintenance on my spaceship costs enough as is. And the cloaking devices are costly devices.
       The hum of that expensive cloaking device ate away at my ears. Why did the power core have to be in the helmet? Even with the device I had to distance myself to make sure they didn't hear me. Though maybe today I would get the photo I wanted. A good, clear photo of one of the hardest things to catch in beautiful form.
        A jogger. Oh, yes those wonderful human joggers. Not elegant on their own, but the sheer difficulty of getting a good shot of one mid-trot. The bragging rights. I've been on this beach before and gotten plenty of shots of sunbathers. Though anyone can document that. That's kids stuff. But a good shot of a jogger in a good pose without blur shows a steady tentacle. The trick though is to not catch them alone, not that won't get attention. No my jogger is going to be in a flock. I'll photograph the climax of a marathon when a flock of joggers move in front of one of the human park's fountains.  The timing will be perfect. No other humans will be in the shot. I'm going to time it so that its at the most dynamic moment in the joggers trot. It will be a beautiful image in my portfolio.
       And in the flock comes. Coming. Coming. So many joggers. Yes. I'm in the right position for the dynamic shot. They'll look just right. I'll take the photograph with a perfect hand. It'll look better than those done by professionals! This picture will be the first step in showing me as professional level!
       No. No. No! It's ruined! Why did a bicyclist enter the shot! They never come to this part of the park! Nugh. Great, just great. Wait. I can try again. I'll catch up. I'll get the perfect shot. I'll try again and again until I capture the essence of the joggers and I'll keep moving and on until I make my perfect portfolio of human pictures.

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #TheMeaningOfLife

“Plan ahead.”
MacGyver* #quote


Today I pondered upon another book idea. After my previous one lost steam(making a full on fledged book that satisfies me is difficult. And by full book I mean 90,000 words) I've been ponderin' and ponderin' to get another juicy idea I had faith in. I'm liking another one I'm developing and it may pan out. I dunno, every incomplete book or whatever is just more experience.

The Meaning Of Life


          “Daddy, what exactly is 'life'?” the little robot boy asked his father. Every young robot would ask this question eventually. They would run across it in the history books. They would wonder where everyone came from. It would be inevitable that they would learn about life.
         The robot father's gears clicked and whirred as he knelt down to look his son in the eyes. They both resembled humans but with four legs instead of two and their heads covered with mechanical apparatus. “It's...a complicated thing.”
        “I can understand it Daddy! I know I can!”
        The robot father doubted it. “Robin, you learned about it from looking up where your name comes from didn't you?”
        “Yeah, I couldn't understand at all what I was looking at.”
        The robot father tried to think of some way to convey some concepts he didn't completely understand. “Son you learned about bacteria in class right?”
        “Yeah but it's nothing like the robin! And it's the only life left!”
        The father kept thinking about life and what he'd been taught and read himself. “Well see...life is...well...you know how every time you have a birthday we upgrade you to your next year of development?”
        “Yeah...”
        “Well life...upgrades itself,” the father explained gesturing his arms as if it made things clearer.
        “How does something do that?”
        “It uh...eats?”
        “What's eating?”
        “Well, um, its like charging...but your taking other things and making their parts yours...? It's something called digestion.”
        “Taking other parts? Like recycling?”
        “Yes! Like that! And the life uses that to upgrade itself on its own!”
        “So it's a robot?”
        “No, its not a robot, eating is taking the parts of other life to make itself bigger, but then other life can just do that by absorbing sunlight like solar panels...I think?”
        Robin looked at his father confused. “This sounds nothing like bacteria. You're not making any sense.”
       “I don't think I really understand what I'm saying...” the father replied. At that point humanity had been extinct for five thousand years. A massive meteor wiped out all complex life and tilted the Earth. Only the advanced AI and the bacteria survived. The AI had been built to emulate humans and preserved much history of the old ages, but now they merely mimicked the cycle of human life with upgrades.
        Many years afterward Robin would be fully upgraded to an adult with a fascination of life and find some DNA of complex life fossilized in amber. He would later have a pet robin.

Monday, October 20, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #DamienAndHisClimb

“Drink responsibly.”
Dionysus* #quote


        Today I was testing my Pokemon team on a Pokemon battle simulator before making it on the real game(take this as a lesson that everything is on the Internet.) It's still got many gaps and I'm not sure I'll actually go through the effort of making it since there's a new Pokemon game on the horizon and it might change the rules of how tournaments work. It could very well give me many more or less options. Yeah, video games can have funny balancing and rule changes as things change and sequels come out. Huh, I can follow this yet not remember all the rules of football. Maybe if I played it more. Like shouldn't there be five nickelbacks for every quarterback? Anyway onto the flash fiction!

Damien And His Climb

         Damien didn't cheer. He didn't shout to the sky. He didn't hold up his arms and say he stood atop the world. All expected behaviors of someone who climbed Mount Everest. The other mountaineers enjoyed the view, said their proclamations, congratulated themselves and everyone else.
         But Damien simply stayed silent with snow all over his body and gear. He'd always been the quiet one on the trip. He kept to himself, smiling at whatever jokes people said and walking and pulling his body up the rocks and cliffs with all the other ambitious climbers.
         At home Damien dealt with a stressful life. Many responsibilities running a large company and a divorce ruling that drained him quite unfairly. Though he didn't care about the money, he took the children to his side and maintained full custody(the ex-wife couldn't be bothered). He left the kids only this once to their grandmother to go on this expedition. He put all the stress into energy to climb the mighty mountain.
        The victory filled his heart. He looked not at the amazing view of the ground that the mountain provided, but at the same sky his children would be looking at. He wanted next to climb back down and tell his children the story of his climb. Damien hoped they would listen to it and take the stress of their lives and dispel that to climb their own mountains.

Sunday, October 19, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #ItWasABrightAndStormyMorning

“Let me hold that for you.”
Atlas* #quote


       Today I went to Grandma's house. No shortcut's through the woods were involved nor were wolves so the family gathering went on without a hitch and much fun was had. Anyway onto the flash fiction!

It Was A Bright And Stormy Morning

      It was a bright and stormy morning. Not a cloud in the sky but water flooded the streets and lighting filled the sky. Dogs barked and birds hid. The Sun hung high in air casting warm rays of light on the confused and scared people. With no clouds on top of them the lighting across the sky appeared finger-like on their own. The thunder sounded like the snaps of the fingers.
    One man wasn't confused by the event at all and he held his son while he pointed at the sky. “See my boy? Lighting isn't scary at all. Someday I'll even teach you how to control my machine, but you have to keep it a secret. Now get ready for school.” The supervillain smiled as he sent his kid off.

Saturday, October 18, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #RuiningRuins

“Is that your final answer?”
The Spanish Inquisition* #quote



Today I went to my Pokemon card game thing. Glad I don't play Poker. I would have had one less shirt by the end of the night. Anyway onto the flash fiction!

Ruining Ruins

      We'll construct a city! We'll make a monument! The people decide to leave their mark on the land. Magnificent structures are built and the ruins of the old are wiped out or damaged for the new along with all the history.
     A few decades later some new voices speak: We'll construct a city! We'll make a monument! The people decide to leave their mark on the land. Magnificent structures are built and the ruins of the old are wiped out for the new along with all the history.
     Then after that it begins again and again. All as humanity marches on. And the first mentioned were no modern people. They were the ones who stripped the marble from the pyramids many years ago. But eventually what they created became stripped for parts itself.

     Every person that cries “We'll build a city!” is building eventual ruins.

Friday, October 17, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #ImpossibleFutures

“I'm just singing in the rain.”
Noah* #quote

CJ might be coming over tomorrow, but it's not certain. Either way, I'm certain I'll find myself in some sort of barrel full of shenanigans. Anyway onto the flash fiction!

Impossible Futures


           There was once a little girl that would have visions of certain futures. But only impossible futures. Futures that were guaranteed to never come true. She could tell they were visions because when they appeared in her head it was like she was imagining something but the image sparkled like she had put glitter on an old movie picture. She at first thought she was just imagining things in an odd way but she learned they were visions of the impossible when she had a series of visions in a row while playing rock-paper-scissors with her older brother who thought she was cheating somehow. (Her visions of impossible futures told her what he wouldn't use so she won every time)
         She got visions of all kinds. She would get visions of them winning the lottery and moving into a wonderful mansion. She saw herself getting an A on a math test even though she was terrible at math. She got a vision of their favorite TV celebrity visiting their home. She had a vision of a wonderfully fun snowfall on a hot summer afternoon. The image of a old-timey circus in her front lawn entered her mind one day. Another time her favorite cartoon character talked to her in her room. Next she saw herself going to a school where grades didn't matter and all the classes were fun. On a boring day she had a vision of her getting a cuddly pet dragon and naming it spot based on a bundle of red scales among its other green ones.
         Then one time she had a vision who's sparkles were less like glitter and more like sparks. She had this vision while she was playing with her dolls after school on a Friday afternoon. The impossible future in this vision was of her Dad returning home alive from his job as a fireman.

Thursday, October 16, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #ItCameFromTheCloset

“Are you thinking what I'm thinking?”
Plato* #quote


Today I went to my costuming club, tomorrow I'm going to my pokemon card game thing. I came up with a new team idea for the pokemon video game. It'll use the move gravity, which will allow me to use the pun “You don't understand the gravity of the situation.” Hopefully the mind-numbing badness of the pun will distract them. Anyway onto the flash fiction!


It Came From The Closet

         It always happened after bedtime. After Mom tucked me in. The moonlight would disappear off like someone flicked a light switch. The slow creaking of the closet door started next. Two glowing red eyes showed up and I grabbed my blanket tight.
      “Little boy, little boy. It's that time of night again,” a deep voice sang to me. “The time of night when my magic shuts your door and stops all your screams from being heard.” The voice laughed and laughed as the glowing red eyes came closer to me. I saw the outline of hands under the small red glow of the eyes. “Will it be the spiders tonight?”
       It drew closer and closer. And when it came close enough I did something I hadn't done any of the other nights. I pulled out a can of hairspray I stashed under the blanket and sprayed the red eyes.
     “Itburnsitburnsitburnsitburnsitburnsitburnsitburns!” The red lights vanished as the hands covered them. “Mrrrgggh-you-little-son-of-ahh-dear-oh-dear-the-pain!” The closet door slammed shut. “I'm never coming back here again! Ahhh-it-still-burns! Rubbing it only makes it worse!”
      I'm glad I saw that TV show where that person defended themselves against a burglar. It looked like the same method worked. And I didn't even have to use the bat.

Wednesday, October 15, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #TheDevilDealsInTheDigitalAge

“A penny saved is a penny earned.”
-Genghis Khan #quote

         Tomorrow's the costuming club. Things should happen as they usually do. Nothing won't as it usually doesn't. Funny how that works huh? Anyway onto the flash fiction!

The Devil Deals In The Digital Age


       Hello everyone! It's me the devil himself. Yup. Mr. S. Satan in the flesh! And boy do I have some good news for you! Normally in my deals I would have to take time out of my schedule to meet each mortal individually which is why I can deal with so few people. However I've realized its a digital age now and I've changed by business strategy.

       Introducing The Devil Deal App or DDA for short. It can be downloaded right to your phone to be used on the go so you can make deals with me any time you want! It's very convenient using your modern touch based interface to its maximum potential. The deals are all automated so you don't even have to deal with me directly. Millions of deals are already programmed in for you to search for with our DevilEye Search Engine. And if you still can't find what you're looking for our customer service is available to point you to it or we can arrange a custom deal.

       Now I bet your wondering “Why Satan how do I pay for all this? I don't have all the money in the world, and I'm not certainly not giving my soul up!” Well that's not a problem! The DDA is completely free! Plus I've realized that souls are a currency of the old days. Why would I need them if I've already got enough people here in heck? Everyone can use the DDA with one simple currency that everyone has, rich and poor. Time.

       Yup. Just time off your mortal lives. Seconds, minutes, hours, days, to years. I have plenty need for life force and think of all that time you've wasted in your life? Why don't you give me some time off your life and get a car? Or better yet some capital to start a business? That could make your life more entertaining and full of action. How many of you are home alone? A single year gets you a love potion that'll make sure you're never alone again? Why waste your time when we can strike a deal today! Download the DDA and get your deals started the swift and easy way!

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #TheMostPowerfulMonster

“Ticket please.”
St. Peter* #quote


       Well read about a scientist developing faster than light travel for NASA today(It had to be coming right?) It seems that, like many science things its still in the working stages and they're still in the proof-of-concept stages along with planning and some-such. I read a few articles on it, here's one of them: http://www.washingtonpost.com/news/post-nation/wp/2014/06/11/this-is-the-amazing-design-for-nasas-star-trek-style-space-ship-the-ixs-enterprise/ Anyway onto the flash fiction!

 The Most Powerful Monster

        Sir Trenton faced the most powerful of all monsters in its own den. To describe the beast in full would require an insane mind that could comprehend all levels of its demonic form. Parts from all manner of creatures phasing in and out of existence all over the place in every moment. A tentacle replaced with a foot then a claw then a tentacle again then a tongue. Every new piece appearing and disappearing from the red mist of its center as it walked in a perfect sequence so that the creature never fell or stumbled. No head could be seen on the monster, but eyes moved along the outside of the thick red mist that formed the inner body. When it spoke to Sir Trenton it felt like voice boomed from around the room.
      “Why are you in my home?” the monster's voice tore a hole in reality and with a loud snap in the air ghosts appeared in the den.
       “To stop you from terrorizing the lands,” Sir Trenton said as he nervously pulled out his sword. He was picked for this mission due to his mighty strength...but could he really do this?
       “Terrorizing? Explain human.” The monster closed in.
Sir Trenton shook. “You've been taking livestock from the villagers as they grazed. This has damaged their livelihoods and they may not make it through the winter. The king cannot supplement the people for the damage you've caused forever.”
        The monster's eyes all rolled in disbelief. “Unbelievable. Those animals were yours. Fine I'll go hunting in the woods to the South. Brand your life stock next time. And put that sword away. You look ridiculous. What kind of decent person tries to ask someone to do something with sword in their hand? Some knight. Now leave. I was reading a good book.”
       Sir Trenton left, a little unsure as to what kind of book the monster would want to read anyway.

Monday, October 13, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #TheTestamentsOfThePieces

“Eeeny... meeny... miny...mo!”
Sherlock Holmes* #quote

Today I read comics on the Internet and was trying different kinds of exercises. Have to be careful though, too strenous things can make me have more seizures. Anyway onto the flash fiction!

The Testaments of the Pieces

        The Pawn: I often feel the first touch of attention. I often then feel first dismissive thought as an acceptable loss.
        The Knight: I don't feel as noble as the real human ones do. I feel deceptive and sneaky. I break the rules the other pieces must follow as I jump over pieces. I escape situations that other pieces would die in. I feel like I have unfair advantage over my brothers.
        The Bishop: I zig-zag through life, often passing by others as I take pieces. I feel like I'm being judged when I pass by them.
        The Rook: I don't feel much. I go straight. I stop. I go straight again. What more is there to life?
        The Queen: Everyone loves me. I can do what the rook and the bishop can do. I feel like the most valuable piece on the board because I am.
        The King: I feel like a constant burden. The players never defend me because I'm useful. They only defend me because I will make them lose. And when the opponent goes after me it is not because I am a threat, it is because I am vulnerable. I think I'm the most useless piece on the board.

Sunday, October 12, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #TheDuelForDragonsBlood

“To be or not to be.”
Schrodinger's Cat* #quote


Today I was hanging out with CJ. Y'know socially, not like any sort of execution hanging. That can get messy.



The Duel For the Dragon's Blood



          “So how many times has been Merlin? Battle 50 somethin'.” I laughed while the wizard chased me on his pegasus. Did he really think that winged horse could catch up to me in the clouds? This is my domain. After all I am a dragon.
          “You beast! I will have your blood!” The wizard shot lightining from his staff. I admit the thing looked impressive when it glowed. But the lightning merely went straight to my horns atop my head.  All my life I thanked my ancestors for evolving those enchanted horns to divert lighting from both storm clouds and pesky wizards. If I didn't have them his little plan to roast my wings may have worked.
         “Y'know I thought a wizard of your caliber would know about our horns.” I then thought for a moment and smiled with my sharp teeth. “Hey didn't you try that last time you chased me in the sky. I like the Pegasus though. Before you've been using griffons and magic carpets.”
         Merlin grew agitated. Just like he did every time. “Stop your banter monster! Every single one of these battles would come to an end if you just let me catch you.”
        “No!” I yelled at him. “You will not jab that thing into my flesh! I will not suffer that kind of pain.”
       His face grew red. “How could a dragon be so pathetic? I've been shooting lighting at you and you're afraid of that?”
        I stopped in the air. I wouldn't take him downplaying this. “Lighting is nothing. That thing is sharp.”
Merlin growled. “It's a shot! It's just a shot!”
        “I hate shots!” I shouted back.
        “It'll only take five seconds!”
        “No!”
        “You baby!”
        “Bully!”
        “We're testing you for demon worms!”
        “I'd rather have them then a shot!”
        “I already told you the reason you're afraid of them is because the last one you had was when you were two. You're grown now. Take your shot! We wouldn't be having this problem if you hadn't eaten that elder demon like I told you not to.”
         “It was going to kill you.”
          “I could have handled it.”
           “You lost your staff.”
           “Just take the shot!”
           “Hold on, will I get a lollipop when it's over like when I was two?”
             “Wait what? Oh, yes, yes, you will definietly get a lollipop when it's done you can have as many lollipops as you want when it's done.”
           “Okay I'll get the shot.”
           So after the exchange I got the shot...it wasn't as bad as when I was two...and I got two thousand lollipops! Yay! I think Merlin mentioned something about wanting a dog though. I wouldn't mind another pet around the house.

Saturday, October 11, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #ShiverMeScales

“Measure twice, cut once.”
Freddy Kruger* #quote


CJ will be coming over today and also it takes just X + 1 licks to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop. Anyway onto the flash fiction!



Shiver Me Scales


        “Shiver me scales! It be a cold day on the seas laddies,” The dragon pirate captain said while sharpening the claws of his right hand with the hook on his left.
        “Yo' sure Captain Blackscale? Seems ta be pretty warm ta me...” one of the new crewman said who hadn't learned the foolishness in contradicting their leader.
Captain Blackscale spread his wings and they cast a shadow over the whole deck. It reminded all the men on the ship that the old pirate didn't shrink and become feeble with age, but grew strong and large. He kicked the new crewman than contradicted across the ship and left massive claw marks on the subordinates body.
       “There be other reasons that tha sea be cold besides the temperature. It can be chilled with the air of betrayal. Despite this chill laddies, my cold blood boils from this air.”
The crew started whispering among each other while backing away slowly.
        “Silence!” Captain Blackscale breathed fire into the air with smoke and roar that bellowed out an agonizingly long, “Aaaarrrrrrr!” He stomped past his first mate and into the middle of them all. “One of you will die today for your treachery. More if I have to.”
        His first mate spoke, curling his tail to look more subordinate. Tail curling is something that dragon children did naturally so doing it as an adult admitted inferiority. “If I may...”
Captain Blackscale then took his hook and gashed it across the first mate's face. “When I say silence, I mean silence! You've been here long enough to know that.” The Captain then kept addressing the crew. “When we loot the lands I do not keep track of our findin's for fun. I keep track of 'em for appropriate dividin' of spoils. And I found a discrepancy. Someone took a large amount from the stock and expected me to be stupid enough not to notice. The culprit must've did it last time we docked.”
       The entire crew turned to look at Turner Spiketail. He was the only one alone from the group multiple times last time they docked. He had opportunity to sneak on board then hide some of the loot somewhere on land or just sell it to a merchant.
       “Tear his wings! Tear his wings!” The entire crew chanted. “Then make him walk the plank!” Turner Spiketail kept pleading “Not Guilty” to his charges but that only made the crew more enthusatic about tearing his wings and dooming him to the sea.
        The Captain walked into his quarters where the loot was being held. While the crew was distracted throwing an innocent man overboard he took a large amount from the stock of spoils and hid them. Now if anyone checked the story Blackscale told would appear true. He figured he would have to wait another few years before doing the same act again. Then he'd have another set of crewman or all the old ones would have forgotten it enough to not catch on.

Friday, October 10, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #ShakespearesLostPlays

“Seek and ye shall find.”
Waldo* #quote


Tomorrow CJ will be coming over so that should be as fun as a barrel of monkeys but hopefully not as dangerous. Anyway onto the flash fiction!


Shakespeare's Lost Plays


       Shakespeare made many, many works in his lifetime. Yet some works never went public. Never saw the light of day. Lost to the shadows of his mind, home and maybe a few drafts and practices. Though now the annals of history. Why would such a great man deprive the world of his works?
Because he didn't think he would make any money of them.
        In the old ages people needed their meal tickets as much as anybody does now. Shakespeare produced a wrote plays in those days, and like the producers of our era he needed to make ends meet. The great works of Shakespeare, spinoffs, ripoffs, and innovations of old tales. The man was Hollywood before Hollywood existed. The Lost Plays were the scripts that didn't make the cut that would allow the great poet to eat next week. The same thing strikes artistry today.
        History lost many of Shakespeare's plays due to his need for a practical living. How many artists last that truly starve? And now the world sees lost work from so many others from the same principle.
        How many works of humanity's Shakespeare's have been lost due to their mortal needs? How much is their work made only because they are mortal?


Author Comment: I didn't have the time to come up with anything with a plot, so I came up with something “deep”.

Thursday, October 9, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #OurLivesInARainbow

“You can't take it with you.”
Gollum* #quote


       Texted with CJ today, looks like he'll be coming over this weekend. If he has a copy we may even play that new game I've been playing recently. (It's on the Nintendo 3DS so we both need a copy for each of our systems).



Our Lives In A Rainbow

Red is the color of the blood in the womb.

Orange is the color of the sky on our first sunset.

Yellow is the color of the Falls we see.

Green is the color of the summers and springs.

Blue is the color of the winters along with them.

Indigo is the color of the deep, dark blue night sky we end each day under.

Violet is the color of our cold, dead skin.

Wednesday, October 8, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #TheManFasterThanLight

“He'll sing like a canary.”
Tweety Bird* #quote



         Planning on going to the costuming club tomorrow. It should be a barrel of fun as usual. Hopefully we'll get a good deal of work done on those props for the university event. It's nice to do something fun with at least moderate importance. (And since the props are coming out so well, maybe they'll really add to the experience. They are both props and costumes for photo ops which will be fun. We're making the characters for people to take pictures with. I suppose imagine Disneyland without Mickey runnin' around. Would be a sad day around the park eh?) Anyway onto the flash fiction!

The Man Faster Than Light

        The fastest thing is supposed to be light. Nah. I am. Speedman. Not a very good name for a hero...but when I was starting out I wasn't very clever. I've been running to stop crimes and am a professional athlete all I have to do is just slow down, hilariously it is a great secret identity. No one would think to look in the most obvious of places. Also as an athlete I talk about how much I hate “Speedman” and other superheroes for having some sort of lucky circumstance being a shortcut. My origin story has me being exposed to an alien artifact that fell in my backyard.
        I found out that I could out speed light mostly by accident. One day when training in-costume I decided I would just keep running as fast as I could. Not thinking at all about my limitations until my body told me I couldn't take any more. Now, in order to handle my speed my body held incredible endurance and strange properties. Ones I learned when I found myself in space.
       I couldn't quite figure out what I ran on. I didn't want to slow down because I didn't know what would happen if I stopped. Did going fast keep me alive? Like science fiction movies new and old the stars and planets became lines flying by me and I could no longer see them in detail. Then my eyes could only see flashes of light. I closed them to protect them from the crazy rave of colors.
      The alien artifact allowed my body to accelerate...did I even need to run? Was running only something my body did because it thought it had to. When the notion passed my mind I went limp yet still kept moving forward. What did the artifact do to me?
      The image of Albert Einstein crossed my mind. Didn't him and a couple of other scientists say nothing could travel faster than light. The speed of light: The universe's speed limit. If my brain worked on electricity and chemicals than it shouldn't be able to move fast enough to keep up with my moving body and allow me to even think these thoughts. Yet somehow the alien artifact allowed me to break the speed limit. This law of the universe had no meaning to me.
       Or did it? It didn't cross my mind until this point. But breaking a law has consequences. You're punished. There must have been something that happened to allow me to travel faster than light. I tried to slow down. Take a break to think about it. But I couldn't. I could no longer stop. I kept going and going. I figured out my punishment for being a lawbreaker. To break the laws of the universe you can no longer be a natural part of it.
      It may take millennium for scientists to even discover what kind of thing I had become.

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #HexsKitchen

"Is there a doctor in the house?"
Mr. Hyde* #quote

If a toaster toasts bread exactly what does a milker do? Anyway onto the flash fiction!

Hex's Kitchen


        “Salad!?” Chef Yamsar's face turned it's token red. “You're preparing salad!? You idiot! We're serving dragons! No dragon is going to want salad! I should toss you off the show right now just for having that stupid idea cross your mind let alone actually the dish! Toss that in the garbage before any of them see it!” If Chef Yamsar could breathe fire he would. It could certainly add to the drama of the reality show being filmed. Hex's Kitchen was an absurdly popular show on wizard television. It was also one of the few shows that got praise from Merlin. Probably because it had an older more experienced wizard yelling at younger ones.
        “Sorry!” The young chef replied.
        “Sorry doesn't do anything! You need to start fixing the problem! The other team is already preparing actual meat for the dragons! Get to work!” Chef Yamsar left that contestant alone. All the chefs were contestants in this mess. Their team loses and their least performing members get kicked off. So they were competing with both the enemy team and their allies. The temptation to curse the dish of a teammate was high and had been done before.
         But enchanting your own dish was much more important, and expected. Wizards used magic in the kitchen. That didn't mean life was easier than for people in worlds without magic. That meant standards were higher and Chef Yamsar didn't make it easy to focus when his voice rocked the kitchen. Even when he wasn't yelling his presence made the chefs uncomfortable.
        “This isn't like last week when we served some golems. You can't just enchant some clay and put it on a plate. Dragons have tastes. Particular tastes. And these are nobles! They demand class!” Chef Yamsar made sure he grinded his point home to the contestants. It was in his contract.
         The Chef's made themselves busy. Very, very busy. The show made it so that the chefs didn't have orders to work off of. They had to just had to “surprise” the dragons. That was the week's challenge. That's what caused the salad incident. That chef dealt fine with orders before. Imagination wasn't his strong suit though. But glancing over to his partners and copying them with a few variations convinced himself he had been original enough.
         “What is wrong with you? I see your mouths move then you put something on the grill then your mouths move again. Can't you idiots chant your spells and cook at the same time? No wonder all the dishes these kitchens spit out don't have enough magical punch to them! You're not actually using magic! Cast, cast, cast! Do I need to explain everything to you?” In earlier seasons Chef Yamsar didn't give the Chefs advice like that but based on fan chatter picked up by producers they decided to have him drop things in so he didn't seem as “unfair”. But naturally he had to be mean about it. Whether or not is was advice his shouting barraged all the chefs.
         Well, except for one. One very clever chef. A young girl. Half home schooled in wizardry by herself. Home schooled in the manner that she spent most of her days and nights of her youth in the library studying magic. She lived deep in the city with a single father who worked long hours. Since he couldn't take her anywhere the only place she could apply her magic growing up was either in normal wizardy school or cooking. She managed to learn nearly every trick in the book and invent many of her own. She could wield a wand and spatula simultaneously, casting enchantments on many dishes at once. A feat that may sound odd or silly to those who don't understand how absurdly difficult it is. Chef Yamsar did yell at her, that was mandatory of the show, yet he had to make up excuses to do so. Posture and mannerisms was what he could come up with. He had to hold her to higher standards.
        Yet despite all her skill she did lose the competition. The goblin is in the details. She may have been a genius in magic and had practiced magic on food for so long but her skills could only take her so far. She practiced at home. Her friends and father were her taste testers. But she never was formally schooled in cooking. So in the final week of the competition she found out the hard way that ice giants were allergic to red peppers. If a human had eaten that dish they would have been wowed by the flavor. But that ice giant had been sent to the hospital.
       Didn't stop her from selling a cook book.

Monday, October 6, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #TheOldGhost

“His bark is worse than his bite.”
Treebeard, Lord of The Rings* #quote


Why are sunglasses made of suns? Anyway onto the flash fiction!

The Old Ghost

        Hello happily alive dolt. Enjoy it while it lasts. If you're lucky you'll move on and won't become a ghost like me. I'll introduce myself, but I don't really remember. To ghosts the name you had when you were a fleshbag doesn't really matter to much. Being in our state is much easier to deal with by letting go of the old days. Now my fellow undead call me Steam since I look a heavy, thick steam. On days I have nothing too interesting to think about sometimes I wonder if you living folk would see me the same if your mundane eyes could perceive ghosts.
       Ah, the reason I contacted you. Well besides to tell you your lucky to be still breathing I do have another reason. Turn down the noise. All of it. Ghosts get more energy by being around more people but now cities have only gotten more noisy. Going out to the countryside and suffering with less energy for less peace is still noisy.
       We reach an impasse. Ghosts feed of happiness. You used technology to make yourself happy. Make food more plentiful. The noise isn't simply just the grinding of gears or the whirring of a fan. So much art and music. From paintings in art galleries, pounding music in art galleries, to graffiti.
I'm old. I yearn for the day when people were happy just because they had ignorance of other joy. Now I have to deal with your all this noise in your consciousness. The other, younger ghosts are adapting. I'm millions of years old. Go backwards for me. Even the poorer nations in this modern world are starting to know happiness and an expanded consciousness beyond the primal joy of just getting to the next day.
       Though if you must live in a kind of happiness that I cannot feed on, you'd better enjoy it. An understanding of it may determine whether or not you move on.

Sunday, October 5, 2014

Today's #flashfiction #PerilousPortrait

“Anorexia is a disease.”
Pac-Man* #quote


        Been still enjoying my new game. Going to be probably also working on the armor with Dad soon since the weather's become cooler. (My epilepsy medication makes me more sensitive to temperature than I used to be.) Haven't had too many seizures recently despite the fact I've been exercising. That's good because one of the problems is that I fear that if I exercise in a too strenuous fashion it'll increase seizures greatly, it's happened before. Anyway onto the flash fiction!


Perilous Portrait

       William Felium the artist got an unfortunate commission one day. He was known as the most skilled artist in all the lands. A large sum would be paid to him for creating a portrait of the King of Stonevale. The misfortune of the commission was the fact that this king possessed several qualities, mercilessness, an evil heart, vanity along with an ugly face.
        Death would await poor William surely! If he painted the king accurately he would be executed because the king looked ugly and the artist portrayed him so. But if he made him look wonderful then it would be seen as an insult because his true face wasn't shown. Either way the vain king would be seen as ugly and his ego bruised. And William soon killed.
       The artist flexed his creative muscles for every minute before the time of painting the portrait came. Tick-tock, tick-tock. The gears of the clock grinding together pulled time closer to his execution. He looked at his color palette and hoped an idea would strike him.
      The king sat down and the artist painted for hours. The guards looked strangely at what he painted.   The brush strokes moved slowly and the king wondered what perplexed the guards so. He couldn't see the painting as being the model he only saw the back of the canvas.
        “Done.” William smiled as a proud artist would though he hid the emotions of his nervous heart.
        The king stood and stretched and moved around to see a painting covered in bizarre swaths of color.  They vaguely represented a human face in a rainbow of colors. It looked pleasing mostly in the the rainbow appearance of the color placement. The blobs of paint swirled to make the shapes in a pattern to please the eye...but the king couldn't see himself much at all. Maybe an odd shape of a crown on the odd human head in the shiny mess of colors.
       “What is this?” The king wasn't quite sure if he should be angry. He felt like he should call his guards to execute the man. “Did I sit for so long for this?”
         William bowed to the king. “My Lord, it is an abstract art representation of your mighty soul as a nobleman captured in a portrait. I decided that a literal portrait would be too simple a piece for you.”
        The king smiled and hung the piece in his gallery. William lived to paint another day.