The Easter Bunny* #quote
CJ isn't coming over this weekend so oh-well, but I'll be certain to get myself into plenty of shenanigans. Anyway onto the flash fiction!
“Gentleman,” the alien spoke to the humans across the table in English the thick accent from his native language giving his vowels a sort of slippery sound, “I simply cannot take a deal where I fail to see the profit for who I'm making the deal with.” The alien went by Mr. H around humans since his name started with an h sound but contained a few sounds that only a few human languages naturally came close to producing. Mr. H wore a blue, long-sleeved shirt and long pants made out of a sort of cotton-like material created from a the wool of a rare creature on their planet. The cotton reflected light slightly to create a gentle glow and the outfit would be considered the equivalent of a suit on their world. He had no hair and frog-like eyes and mouth and nose. His skin stood to be one of the most unique aspects of his race with scales able to spread to open up pores that could excrete a number of things to cover and protect his skin when his body needed it, from simple sweat to a fine film.
“What, are you suspicious?” asked Roland Bartly, the head of the three men speaking with Mr. H. The three men represented corporations and were negotiating mouthpieces. Roland was the most important of all the three since he possessed controlling stock in the company he represented.
“Of course.” Mr. H responded. “You're offering to sell me your solar panels, claiming it was to spread awareness of your product, but the loss of setting up the panels on my planet is ridiculous. The amount of panels you need to equal my steam output would cost an absurd amount of money. And there's no reason for my people to want solar power anyway since there are no environmental laws promoting it and all the steam my factories give off we're fine with.” Mr. H's skin moved a little in some spots as a reflex to the thought. His species's skin allowed steam power to be used without much care. The skin filtered any problems with the byproducts. A moss rampantly grew on their planet that they harvested, hardening with a simple process into something like coal for their engines. Their planet and people were hardier than Earth.
“We're just trying to sell solar panels to the people of your world.” Roland smiled.
Mr. H stood up from the table they were negotiating at said, “I don't know what you're trying to do. But I didn't become one of the richest of my kind by being tricked. I won't buy solar panels for my factories, even the small fraction that you're asking me to. You will get nothing from me.” Mr. H walked away from Bartly and the other men. He assumed he dodged being ripped off. However the alien overestimated his importance in the grand scheme of things. The corporations that the three men represented now regretted that they bought the land next to Mr. H's factories.
Humanity was buying land where they could. However the rampant use of steam made it difficult for humans to settle. Due to the way their skin could manage them Mr. H's species functioned fine with their technology and used it everywhere, but it made their world like a vindictive sauna to humans and forced them to being tourists in protective suits or environments. But corporations and governments in the guise of corporations aimed to change the alien world with one resource they knew worked. Money.
And they just needed to find the right people to buy, they couldn't stop every household, but they planned to puncture holes in areas in the world by finding people like Mr. H who controlled large sources of steam. Mr. H didn't listen, but they figured that eventually they'll find enough aliens with the right prices.
Until then Mr. H goes to bed watching the sun of his world set on a horizon filled with steam.