Today's #flashfiction Cat Court

“Think outside the box.”

Erno Rubik* #quote

I consider myself a man of many tastes. One of them being salty. Anyway onto the flash fiction!

Cat Court

           Judge Halton worked hard to keep his professional demeanor. He considered enforcing the law his most sacred duty. He spent many years devoted to it, making sure that any and all decisions fit everything perfectly. He dealt with many people who exploited loopholes, and despite his mental protests he felt he didn't exist to be someone to just bend the law as it fit him. But what the defense argued mocked the law.

           “And so it is Mr. Huggles that owes the plaintiffs the ten million, not any of my clients.” The defense lawyer wore a fancy smile and suit. He cut his brown hair in a simple, serious way that didn't match his ludicrous argument. However when Judge Halton looked into the lawyer's eye's he could tell that the lawyer must have been aware of the whole Huggles scheme for the entire time it'd been laid out. The defense attorney had no problem presenting his premise.

           Mr. Huggles slept in the courtroom, like most cats would. The jury even began to accept the twisted logic of the longer they stared at the cat. Jared Ronald showed years of documentation about his client's corporation. Or at least what people thought was their corporation. For years it actually belonged to the cat and all the people worked for the cat. Since it had been established in law that people could give possessions to pets, even trusts, the people who created the corporation first set it up how they wanted it operated, set themselves up as employees, then gave all ownership to the cat.             Their plan paid off since years later they managed to dirty their hands and ran into a class action lawsuit for ten million, but all the money and debt fell onto the corporation and the cat. The cat can't even properly file a settlement check, though they set it all up so that the employees could keep running the corporation.

         The prosecutor responded, attempting to keep his professionalism as much as Judge Halton, “You can't expect us to just accept the fact that everyone should collect the compensation for all the injuries from a cat?”

          Ronald replied, “That's what you'll have to do. My clients are just innocent employees. Mr. Huggles owns the corporation.” The defendants added another devious layer to their scheme by making sure that technically no one owned the cat either.

         Judge Halton clawed into the deep recesses of his mind. He wanted to see if something blew this straight out of the water. This insult to the law. He glanced at the prosecution and could see they were doing the same. Normally as a judge he would purely be neutral, but this whole thing became personal to him. A slap to the face. But no matter how asinine years of paperwork showed the cat being owner. These abusers of the law worked for years to set up this loophole and they tightened Mr. Huggles as their ultimate fall guy. So many people hurt by what they did and they hid behind a little animal. “Come on Thorton.” He muttered the name of prosecution under his breath. Find something. Make sure the jury doesn't convinced by something so stupid.

The prosecution began to reveal a stupidly happy grin, but then stowed it away for a more serious face. James Thorton figured he should keep professional when presenting his next counter-argument.         “The prosecution does not accept your premise. Mr. Huggles cannot be owner of the corporation, your clients still are.”

         “What!?” The defense quickly grew angry. Years of preparing and maintaining the loophole made any challenge to it something that he couldn't accept.

          Thorton continued, “The corporation never changed hands since Mr. Huggles cannot legally own a corporation. None of the defendants own him, they label him as a stray. Therefore we cannot prove that Mr. Huggles is a legal citizen. Now if you want to argue against that reason for being unable to own a business I can find another. However this means that all the money your clients have been taking out of the corporation as payment should have been staying in since Mr. Huggles couldn't have automatically paid them like it was written in the original corporation documents.” The defendants set up the corporation to operate without the owner, allowing them to get paid without the cat technically doing anything. “One thing is for sure, my clients are owed a settlement from the corporation, which had no funds itself. You admitted they were owed a settlement, just that the cat had to pay it. But now it has become apparent your clients own the corporation and need to pay the dues.”

          The jury nodded in agreement. The prosecutor smiled along with the judge. The defense attorney clenched his fist. Mr. Huggles meowed.