Today's flash fiction #TheUniversesStupidestJob

       My friend CJ is coming over again this weekend so I made a short, fun story early as I wouldn't be able to write something while he's here. We'll most likely be editing my book as well as other shenanigans. Anyway enjoy the flash fiction!

         The Universe's Stupidest Job

         I bet some of you think your job is stupid. Some of you probably even think your job is the stupidest job in the world. I'm convinced a few of you think your job is the stupidest in the entire universe. Well trust me, I know, for a FACT, my job is much, much, much, much stupider than yours.

My job is the stupidest job in the whole world, no, the whole universe.

       First off I work inside a secret government facility. Oh, I bet your thinking “But how could a job inside a secret government facility be stupid?” Now it isn't because I'm one of the janitors or guards or something. Oh, no, I'm paid top dollar too. I've got a doctorate in psychology too. I'm one of the important guys. It's a research facility. It's a military facility. It's guarded by tanks and everything. Still wondering how this could be a stupid job? The thing is...

       I just spent the last five hours looking at one of those stupid, cute Internet viral videos. This one had a robot kitten riding a rainbow. Do you know why I was looking at them? See the thing is the government I'm working for is under one of those crazy dictators and he noticed how addicted people get to those viral videos so he's hired us to...ugh...I can hardly say it...he wants us to study them so we can find out how to use them to brainwash the people under his regime and also weaponize them. The idiot plans to put TV screens on TANKS once we've “figured it out”. So yeah, that's what me, and my two hundred other co-workers do(All with PhDs like me) try to crack the “secrets” behind Internet viral videos so the great dictator can brainwash his people and the people of the whole world under his control.

       So if you ever think that your job is the stupidest in the universe just be thankful you don't have mine.