Today I saw a
dietician. There is something called a ketogenic diet, though I am
going to be working on a modified Atkins diet. Why? Actually to help
with my seizures. Oddly enough diets can help with seizures. They
actually still don't know exactly why, but it does. (But doctor's
don't know about why a lot of the medications work, and that's what
my doctors have told me up front.) Epilepsy is a strange condition
with tons of variations with mine being a rare case of a rare case.
Here's the funny part, I'm actually going to be REQUIRED TO EAT
BACON. Well, not bacon all the time. I can do eggs or cheese or other
things. It's an interesting thing and we're still planning with the
dietician exactly what we're going to do especially since she hasn't
gotten my medical info from my neurology clinic. (I'm not doing the
diet to lose weight, though many people do, I'm doing it to change
the type of energy my brain is burning, things are much more
complicated.) Anyway onto the flash fiction!
A Field Trip
In Humanity
“Teacher,
what language am I speaking right now?” said a tall black, male
with dyed blonde hair. “It's got such a weird grammatical
structure. And this body is so weird. Two legs? I feel dizzy.”
Another student
then said, “Can I sit down? It's hard to stand on these.” This
student was medium sized woman with black hair.
The teacher
then said. “Yes children you may sit down. I know you're used to
walking in six legs, so standing in two must be hard.” The teacher
was a pale white man in black suit. He wore a massive, obnoxiously
colored sombrero. “Now I know you're not used to seeing humans, so
just to make sure that you don't forget which one of us is me I'll be
wearing this 'sombrero', it's a human hat. The language you are
speaking is English.” There were about thirty students with the
teacher and they were all in a tiny meadow in the middle of the
woods. Besides the teacher all the others wore loose, comfortable
clothes.
One of the
students groaned. “God, it's awkward whenever one of the language
machines transplants a new language into our brain. Hey, what's God.
And what did I just do?”
The teacher
then explained. “God is one of the human deities. And what you just
did is 'groan'. It's a human verbal action that can express disdain
or disgust. It can also be a natural reaction to pain in humans.”
The teacher then smiled. “What I just did is smile, its a sign of human
happiness among other things.”
One of the
students then said. “This is so frustrating. Even when the machines
but languages in our head it comes in slowly and we don't understand
the words we say until after we say them because the words blurt out
from our subconscious then we it goes back into our head consciously.
I'm surprised I even said that.”
The teacher
then smiled again. “That just shows you're adapting well. In this English
language this is called the Subconscious-Conscious-Wraparound effect.
Words and expressions are pulled from the subconscious which is how
one of our other students mentioned God without knowing who the diety
because the language came from the subconscious. Then now everything
is leading back to your conscious brain and is being reinforced even
more in the subconscious.”
One of the
students then groaned. “Yeah, this isn't the first time we've
learned another world's language teacher. It's just annoying that
you're making us talk in this language even if there isn't a human
around. Weird, I groaned too!”
The teacher
then said with a coy sneer, “But who's to say that there isn't children? If you
all can't recognize your own classmates because of the adult human
bodies I've placed you in, you obviously wouldn't recognize the human
among you. Could you please step forward Mr. Joneson?”
“Sure Mr.
Blorgyx.” A tall, lean, red-headed came from the crowd of students.
He had sat down with them to blend in with them so he had to stand up
before heading over to be right next to the teacher. “I'm delighted
to meet you all formally. As your teacher said I'm Mr. Joneson.”
The students's
expressions turned to shock. A sort of thing they weren't used to.
Well, they had their own expressions, but since their expressions
were all made with tentacles on their faces, every palette of
expression was different. One of them then yelled, “Wow, a
real-live human! Well, I mean, as real live as you technically
are...sorry.”
The human gave
a comforting smile. “No, no. Do not worry, I am not offended.”
One of the
students then nervously asked. “Then if it doesn't offend you,
could you tell us how it all happened? How you were... virtualized?”
The human
nodded. “Of course. That's part of your lesson in your field trip
to virtual Earth. Now then what happened is a big asteroid was going
to hit my planet. Normally the laws of your world alliances don't
allow you to interfere with planets of a certain evolutionary level.
But whenever one is threatened you come in to save it. Your planet
surveyors were shocked also when they looked closer to learn that we
were much more evolved than they thought.” He then sighed.
“Normally they try to save as much life as they but unfortunately
the life on our planet had evolved to atmosphere levels different
from any of your worlds. So like whenever they run across something
like that they take the most sentient species and isolate their
brains in virtual worlds putting their brains in tanks. I'm actually
a brain in a jar. I do have genetic children, but they are grown in
vats by taking my genetic code to make a new brain. I'm so glad your
people have done such a kindness to allow my people to live in this
virtual Earth.” Then a tiny virtual tear ran down the human's face.
“Though much of the human populace on the real Earth had to be left
behind on real Earth, your ships were only so large on the original
pickup and the original Earth was lost. But you did create a good new
world based on our accounts.”
The children
then cried as well, not exactly knowing what tears were, though
they've know sadness their entire life and they have known that many
planets have been virtualized. “That's sad.”
The human then
smiled. “But that is also the past. Now follow me to the city. I
have many human friends who would love to meet you children!”
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