“This town
ain't big enough for the both of us.”
Mothra* #quote
Well, CJ didn't
come over this weekend as planned so I just worked on my book and
plotted the doom of all mankind as per usual. Anyway onto the flash
fiction!
Fighting
Annoyingman
My minion Steve
didn't come and deliver my coffee on time. That meant some superhero
managed to fight their way through my lair. Odd, considering because
of my security I should have heard some explosions or something. Were
they sneaky? Though the sneaky heroes wouldn't then come through the
front door. Doesn't matter. I'll just kill whoever comes in anyway.
They didn't classify me as an A-Class Threat supervillain for
nothing. Me, Dr. Phantons, master of ghost cybernetics! Mwahahaha!
Oh, even laughing evil in my head is rewarding. I'm seeing the poor
man walk in the open door of my lab now. I think he'll be around the
1000th hero I've gleefully murdered.
The hero who
walked through the door wore the most budgeted costume I ever saw.
Just a big yellow spandex suit, with a big, curly, stylized red A on
it. His blue eyes had the blankest look in them, and his brown hair
looked sloppy and pretty unclean. Possibly containing excessive
dandruff.
“I don't
recognize you. How could a nobody get past my security?” I asked
the nameless hero.
“My name is
Annoyingman and I've come to stop your evil plans.
Dialtone-beeeeeeeep” he replied.
“What?”
“eeeeeeeeeeeeee”
“Stop making
that noise.”
“eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
“Stop that!”
“eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
“Yes, I get
it, you're Annoyingman. Now stop it.”
“eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
“Okay that is
actually getting really, really annoying.
“eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
“Alright,
you're dead.” I then snapped open the Other Plane energy cannon
from my ghost cybernetic arm and blasted the superhero into dust.
“eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
“W-what?
Where's the coming from now?” I turned around.
“You only
killed my robot clone, eeeeeeeeeeeeee”
“How did you
get behind me? That main door is the only entrance to the room!”
“eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
“Y-you! Fine!
If that was you're 'robot clone' then I'll just kill this real you
and be done with it! I've had no trouble killing heroes before, and I
loved it!” I then blasted him to dust.
“You just
killed my other robot clone, eeeeeeeeeeeeee”
I didn't bother
with speaking and shot again.
“And there
went my other, other robot clone, eeeeeeeeeeeee”
I shot again.
“eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
And again.
“eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
More and more
of them came every time I turned around.
“eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
If only I had
eyes in the back of my head to see where they were coming from.
“eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
“Can't you at
least make a different noise!?”
“eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
“Please stop
making that noise!”
“Only if you
turn yourself in, eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
“No, I am not
turning myself in because you keep making this 'eeeeeeeee' noise!
I've killed heroes that could lift one thousand tons. I've killed
heroes that could travel through time!”
“eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
“I'm not
going to lose to a noise!” I kept shooting the clones. “And how
do you keep replicating like this? Why didn't you just attack me with
this horde if you had it all along? It seems like it can teleport
anyway, try and dogpile me why don't you?” I wanted to bait him
into showing more of them. I could blast them quicker anyway. My
entire cybernetic body is an arsenal.
“eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
“Arghh!” I
looked around the room. Trying to focus on other things to get the
noise out of my head. Lab chemicals. Lab robots. My various ghost
analysis machines...wait, my ghost scanner detects fifty ghosts. That
isn't right. I've infused forty-nine ghosts into my body to use my
cybernetic ghost tech...that means...
“Annoyingman!
You're a ghost! That's why I can't kill you!”
“eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
“Don't play
dumb! All you're clones are illusions! You're haunting me! I bet you
haunted my minions and got to them!”
Annoyingman
laughed. “You got me, eeeeeeeee, but you should know that means I
won't ever stop until you turn yourself in, eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
I let out an
evil laugh to protect my pride. “Well I won't let it get to me. Eventually I'll get
used to the noise and then I'll find a way to get rid of you!”
“Get used to
it? Eeeeeeeeeeee....doooooooo......grrraaaaaaaaaaaaa....”
“You have
more noises?”
“As many as
there are stars in the sky...as many as justice
needs...eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
“No! I won't
give up.”
“eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
“I think I
can endure.”
“eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
"Ugh..."
"eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee"
"Uurrrggghhhh"
"eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee"
“Curse you
Annoyingman...I surrender.”
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